lost baby, ex-boyfriends and a neighbour's secret...

i just had a miscarriage and was feeling rather depressed and sluggish. all i wanted to do was to curl up in bed and sleep the days away. so i applied for unpaid leave for a whole week, and since the final year exam is gonna be next month, my leave was approved rather quickly, coz the management thought i'm taking leave to study. for a brief moment, i did worry about the exam, coz medicine is not exactly an easy subject. but for now, i just wanted to sleep.

i ran through in my mind my list of ex-boyfriends... which ex-boyfriend's place should i stay at for this whole week? i can't possibly go home, coz i didn't want my mom to know. i went first to kay's place, but saw that he's staying in an atap house, not unlike the kampung house my late grandma used to stay.

i thought better of it and went instead to ray's place. that was when i realized that ray is actually renting a room in my neighbour's house! i knew that my other neighbour renovated their house to put in additional rooms to be rented out, i didn't realize that this neighbour also did the same. while walking into my neighbour's house, i was very worried that my parents would see me. i was also worried that my neighbour would recognize me, but was relieved when i saw that they had a separated entrance for their boarders.

once i got into my neighbour's house, i was surprised to see that the interior has changed so much from how i remembered it, from when my brother and i were young and we used to traipse over to play with the neighbour's kid. now, the place has been transformed into something like a motel, with room doors along the walls. there were even numbers on the doors! so this is the secret they've been keeping from us all these while huh! and in the middle of the place, there's like a courtyard kinda thing, with so many people milling about. i assumed they're all tenants of my neighbours, so i asked around for ray's room number.

then i saw ray among a group of people. it seems like they're in the midst of a board game of some kind. so i went up to him and asked him which room is his but he told me to wait for him to finish his game first. i was so annoyed! i just had a miscarriage, for goodness sake!  i was just about to open my mouth to say something nasty... then i woke up.

~~~

what a weird dream over the weekend! i guess i slept too much, that my brain went all murky and sluggish. hehehe... but waitaminute, since when is kay my bf, let alone my ex-boyfriend??? dem funny... and in the dream, it seemed like i wasn't too bothered about the identity of father of the baby that i miscarried. also, it seemed like i had a whole long list of ex-boyfriends, huh? :D and the funny thing is, why have to only go to ex-boyfriends' place? why never thought of going to any of my good friends' place? dem weird...

btw, ray is really one of my ex, but i ain't gonna tell which one, so don't ask! :P